Expect mildew to invade the space where you live when Jupiter makes himself at home on 26 June. Exit Mould can’t save your abode once lime scale growth the size of James Packer’s fully erect donger, the Barangaroo development, takes over. Relationships will depend on suggestive communication techniques when Venus connects to Mercury. Ditch the politically correct vernacular and experiment with edgy language as endorsed by Urban Dictionary.
Aries career choices: entrepreneur, athlete, architect
Taurus
Jupiter improves your financial situation until 26 June. The
celestial giant brings recognition of your zine making talents, so take
advantage of this transit and flog your DIY masterworks to the converted. The
key element is Self Belief. Venus stimulates your fourth house after 26 June.
Be mindful not to smother that special someone. The phrase ‘Bunny Boiler’ springs
to mind.Taurus career choices: chef, painter, farmer
Gemini
Mercury forms a T-square alignment between Pluto and Uranus.
Flashes of insight, like the interior of Timothy Leary’s head, occur throughout
the month. In the vein of digital radio, you must turn on, tune in, and drop
out. A Mars-Neptune square highlights the struggle between action and indolence.
Jupiter enters your financial sector on 26 June. Expect Big Money Action to transpire,
but heed the Mercury retrograde slamming the breaks on extravagant spending;
it’s protecting you from a fate worse than debt.Gemini career choices: journalist, teacher, zinester
Cancer
Cancer, this is your month. Mercury and Venus move into your
sign in the first week, followed by Jupiter on 26 June. A new twelve-year cycle
begins. Projects initiated under this transit have the opportunity to expand
and succeed over the next few years. The grounding Capricorn Moon on 23 June
brings a relationship reality check. The Sun forms a grand trine with Saturn
and Jupiter, activating the right side of your brain. The Universe is telling
you to quit acting like a shitbag and start c-r-e-a-t-i-n-g, dude.
Cancer career choices: counsellor, restaurateur, domestic god/goddess
Leo
Venus moves into your sign on 28 June. Find it in your
trademark Heart-of-Gold to forgive that sorry soul who will never reach the
heights of Fabulousness that you inhabit. Avoid chocolate-dipped Churros around
20 June, before the Sun-Jupiter link has a chance to expand your waistline. Jupiter
leaves your social scene on 26 June to retreat deep into your twelfth house. Grow
a beard and put on hemp sandals; this cycle brings opportunities to eradicate self-destructive fears and tendencies while cooking a mean lentil
hot pot.
Leo career choices: actor, beautician, office manager
Virgo
In the spirit of this Wide Brown Land
Virgo career choices: yoga instructor, editor, accountant
Libra
A once-in-twelve-year professional cycle begins on 26 June
when Jupiter enters your tenth house. Expect large scale career growth, that
is, you finally get a job. Congratulations. The Mercury retrograde motion
throws you the nitty-gritty questions during job interviews, however, the Sun-Mercury-Venus
link ensures that you turn on the Libran charm with your Colombian smile and
cocaine nose job. Uranus guarantees that your zine mates will help you retain
your DIY edge amid the mediocrity of selling out.
Libra career choices: interior decorator, hairdresser, diplomat
Scorpio
Scorpio, you should be cashed up and ready for a well earned
break, thanks to Jupiter’s influence over your finances and his ingress into your
travel zone on 26 June. The desire to get away intensifies once the Sun,
Mercury, and Venus join Jupiter the area of the birth chart described by astrologer,
Dana Gerhardt, as ‘our personal alps, where the spirit soars, the mind expands,
and life acquires new meaning’. You’ll be keen to explore uncharted territories
from the window of an uncharted bus. Endeavours that broaden the scope of your wretched
life are crucial for personal growth now. Get excited, buddy; a new adventure
awaits you!
Scorpio career choices: plastic surgeon, drug lord, detective
Sagittarius
Your ruling planet, Jupiter, moves into the constellation of
Cancer on 26 June, triggering a twelve month cycle of growth in the area of other
people’s resources. A tax rebate of three bucks may come your way. Spend it
wisely. This is an excellent time to develop and establish a financial strategy
that will pay dividends when you’re one hundred and eighty four years old. With
Venus forming a trine to your Sun, you’ll live up to personal expectations
effortlessly. Others see you as someone to lean on, and you are more than
capable of helping others during a crisis. The New Moon on 9 June brings novel
energy to a stale relationship. It’s as if you’re spooning a new partner every evening.
Now, isn’t that the Sagittarian way?
Sagittarius career choices: tour guide, lawyer, book publisher
Capricorn
Follow-through in relation to DIY projects strengthens
under the Full Moon on 23 June. A twelve-month love cycle begins on 26 June.
You’ll find it easy to attract a mate under this transit, so kiss goodbye your
solo Saturday night ritual of demolishing Kettle Chips while watching Death In Paradise .
Mercury provides you with the social skills to bedazzle others with bullshit,
while Venus ensures that you’re respectable enough to leave the house in the
first place.
Capricorn career choices: stockbroker, administrator, economist
Aquarius
Jupiter enters your routine and well being sector
on 26 June. Reconnect with daily rituals such as brewing the perfect pot of
Twinings, and observe how it fits into life’s big picture. Understand the
long-term impact work habits have on your health. Learn to say ‘no’ to The Man
occasionally; it may save your hair. A Neptune
transit signals that you’re unlikely to see the truth about your financial
dealings with a Nigerian doctor you met on the Internet.
Aquarius career choices: aviator, scientist, astrologer
Pisces
Pisces, this month is all about having fun while pursuing
your craft. Favourable links from Jupiter and Venus to your Sun indicate that
zine making will be arty but substantial, delicate but poetic, underground but prevalent.
The Mercury retrograde has you penning offbeat poetry that makes the Beat poets
sound about as interesting as Channel Seven news readers.
Aquarius career choices: musician, fishmonger, psychic healer
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